by Jes

Back when I used to cover the Florida Panthers, Mark Parrish was one of my favourite prospects on the club. I always have a soft spot for players who play the kind of game I do when I play ball hockey, and Parrish came from the school of Dave Andreychuk offensive forwards.

Sadly, Parrish has never been quite able to match Andreychuk's numbers, or come close to them, and will probably be known more for being part of the awful Roberto Luongo deal than anything else.

It shouldn't be a huge surprise to see that the Wild, facing some cap issues, had to waive Parrish and his $2.5M+ salary.

"Do I think Mark Parrish can still play in the league, can he make some adjustments to still be effective? Yes," [GM Doug] Risebrough said.

The presence of Parrish, who was paid $2.5 million last season, would have cost the team a salary cap hit of $2.65 million this season, bringing the Wild about $2.1 million short of the cap.

"Too close," Risebrough said. "We were looking for a little relief away from the cap."

The team had few options, he added. "I looked at Mark's salary and at what I thought his contributions would be and they were not totally in line," he said. "It's not Mark's fault;

I negotiated the contract."

One other noticeable trend, besides the fact that Parrish was good at not taking penalties, is that Parrish NEVER got 200 shots on goal in one season ... not even close! You'd figure a net hang-a-rounder like Parrish would easily cross that threshold, but the guy never seemed to be consistent enough to be a dangerous offensive machine.

Parrish has had a solid career, and done well for a 3rd round draft pick, but I still get the feeling he could have been so much better.

* Over at Wild Puck Banter, Pavol Lover Roy Malhberg suspects that Jacques Lemaire had a hand in this transaction. Is there something between Parrish and Lemaire we don't know about?

Labels: Jacques Lemaire, Mark Parrish, Wild

by Jes

Much to the joy of Canucks fans, the off-season has not been terribly kind to the Minnesota Wild.
Besides losing His Worship Pavol Demitra to free agency, the Wild also lost 2-way rock star Brian Rolston, as well as Branko Radivojevic.

Replacing them? An overpaid over-the-hill Owen Nolan.

Wow.

Let's check out the roster and salary commitments for the Wild as of right now.



Goaltending - Harding and Backstrom give the Wild a fairly strong pair for reasonable salary.

Defence - The strength of the Wild, with a noticeably pricey salary structure. Not a lot of good deals down here, but a group that possesses good mobility and puck moving. The Wild will obviously utilize their speed and passing to keep up a good transition game.

Forwards - The big weakness of the Wild, especially after the departures of Rolston and Demitra. The Wild have a few decent weapons, and little else. Nolan is a decent role player, and Parrish's offence has declined in his later career. Overall, this forward group won't put up many goals.

Never underestimate what Jacques Lemaire can do with a club, and we know the Wild will certainly be tough to play against. For sure, the Wild will be even more boring to watch on TV as Lemaire will have to tighten his system even further.

Right now, the Wild don't appear to be a playoff-bound club, despite what magic Lemaire can make. The Wild will certainly be a great team at preventing goals, but the lack of quality talent and lack of offence will ultimately kill this club.

Labels: Brian Rolston, Off-Season Analysis, Pavol Demitra, Wild

It appears that our master, lord, and saviour, Pavol Demitra, has been named CAPTAIN of the Minnesota Wild.

Thanks to Mirtle and Roy from Wild Puck Banter for sending me this information.

SAINT PAUL/MINNEAPOLIS, Minn. - Minnesota Wild President and General Manager Doug Risebrough and Head Coach Jacques Lemaire announced today that forward Pavol Demitra will serve as team captain for the month of October. Brian Rolston and Wes Walz will serve as permanent alternate captains.

Demitra, 32 (11/29/74), collected 64 points (25-39=64) in 71 games for the Wild in 2006-07, his first season in Minnesota. Entering his 11 th NHL season, Demitra has posted 645 points (266-379=645) in 682 career games with St. Louis, Los Angeles and Minnesota. Demitra hails from Dubnica, Czechoslovakia.

Minnesota will continue to rotate its team captaincy on a monthly basis this season based on the player who has shown the greatest leadership qualities.

Rolston (October, November and January), Keith Carney (December) and Mark Parrish (February, March and April) wore the 'C' for Minnesota in 2006-07.

You may now bow down and kiss the skates he ... err ... skates in!

I am quite surprised that Pavol was given this honour, given the fact that he is a very quiet guy and has been generally shy about talking much due to his (self-perceived) lack of Engrish skills.

Pavol joined Zdeno Chara among the rare air of Slovak NHL captains. If Florida was smart, they would give their C to Josef Stumpel and we'd have a trifecta.

Labels: Pavol Demitra, Slovak hockey, Wild

By Jes

Over at Das FanHaus, I have a capsule preview of the Minnesota Wild, a team which will give the Canucks a great deal of competition in the Northwest division.

Just like the Canucks, the Wild pretty much stood pat, and did very little other than trade Manny Fernandez for Petr Kalus.

I know it's hard to believe, but Marian Gaborik has never had more than 40 goals or 70 points in a season.

He's got Pavol, he's got speed, he's got health (I hope), so now is the time to break the 40-50 goal plateaus and show us that he's a true star. There has been so much potential for this guy to skate circles around the league, but various factors, self-induced and not, have held this guy back. Really, he's got a huge salary, and needs to start earning it.

Here's the salary structure for the Wild.

It wasn't so long ago that the Wild had a pretty decent roster chalk full of cheap guys. Now? They are a fairly expensive roster, with few bargains to be found. Johnsson is pricey, Parrish is overpaid, and the rest of their stars are well compensated.

The Wild still have some room to add another piece or two, especially at RW, where Parrish isn't so productive any longer, and Koivu is playing out of position.

I fear the Avalanche' offence, but their goaltending is suspect. The Wild have a well-balanced team, a great coach, and good goaltending. It will certainly be a tight race between the Canucks/Wild/Avalanche, and I expect many great divisional matchups throughout the season.

Labels: Marian Gaborik, Mark Parrish, Minnesota, Off-Season Analysis, Pavol Demitra, Wild

by Jes

Is anyone else surprised by this year's version of the Ottawa Senators? They have this whole 'Team of Destiny' vibe to them that I felt with the Carolina Hurricanes last year. It's very weird to see a team coached by Bryan Murray actually not suck in the playoffs.

I have more on these surprising Sens at The NHL Fanhouse.

As for the Sabres, they've looked like a team that hasn't quite been there during these playoffs. Oh, they won their first two series without much in the way of casualties, but there was always that feeling that they weren't playing their A-game. Well, their special teams have failed them, Tallinder is hurt, and they can't generate offence. I never figured THIS Sabres club would have problems scoring goals.

Back to the Sens, I find myself tempted to join the bandwagon. Oh, I hate the city of Ottawa, but I gotta support the one lone Slovak remaining in the playoffs (Meszaros).

I'd love to see the cup come to a Canadian city, especially over Murder City, USA, or Anaheim, the city of hotel after hotel.

Also at the NHL Fanhouse:
1. A funny video of a pizza commercial starring Martin Brodeur and Luc Robitaille.
Unlike Gretztky's boring-ass commercials (Save for the Brian Leetch as a figure skater), this commercial is actually GOOD.

2. A look at the Minnesota Wild's goaltending glut.
Worst-case scenario, they are stuck with Fernandez/Harding.
Best case scenario, they re-sign Backstrom for fairly cheap, trade Fernandez for a draft pick, and go with Backstrom/Harding.

Either way, they can't really lose, can they?

3. One little Sabres fan who won't give up hope!! - Obviously, someone hasn't been jaded by years of failure...

4. ... Unlike Tom Luongo, who's seen enough Buffalo sports teams fail to drive him to drink straight out of the keg.

Labels: Martin Brodeur, musings, sabres, senators, Wild

by Jes



It's been harder to cheer against the Minnesota Mild this season now that two of my favourite players, Pavol Demitra and Marian "Potatohead" Gaborik (BFFL), have teamed up together to provide them with the Supersonik Slovak Scoring Duo.

The Canucks? They have zero Slovaks and two Czech bald guys. As hard as Jan Bulis might try, he can't really emulate The Pavol.

It doesn't help that the Wild don't have many players, other than EMO Wanker/Foo Fighter wannabe Brian Rolston, that I despise with much fervor.

As awesome as the Canucks have been since Christmas, the Wild have nearly as good, and now have a team record 8-game winning streak, leaving them right on the Canucks asses like a couple on Davie Street.

The Wild also set a team record with their 43rd win, and don't seem to be showing any signs of slowing down.

Comparing the Canucks and Wild's records for 2007, we see a lot of ass-kickery.

               Vancouver      Minnesota     Edmonton
JANUARY          8-1-3          7-4-2        sucky
FEBRUARY         8-3-1          8-2-2        suckier
MARCH            9-1-1          9-1-1        suckiest

Of course, much of this has to do with the return of Potatohead from an injury which cost him about 20 games. Once he returned, Demitra rediscovered his touch and now the Wilds are on fire. D'oh...

Story Link:

Marian Gaborik and Pavol Demitra have been on the same NHL team for 75 games, but they're making plays like a duo that's skated together for years.

Gaborik scored twice and Demitra had a goal and two assists as the Minnesota Wild won their franchise-record eighth consecutive game, beating the St. Louis Blues 5-1 on Thursday night.

"I try to look for him every time when I have a puck," said Gaborik, who has combined with Demitra for 66 points in Minnesota's last 24 games. "I make those three or four steps, and I know the puck's going to be there. It's good to know that. We've been great that way, and it's working."

Every time I watch the highlights, I'm waiting to see the Minny highlights and watch these two perform some on-ice magic.

Yeah, I find myself cheering when the Wild score (only for these two, anyway), which is just....wrong!!

If the Canucks get knocked out of the playoffs, and Minny is still in it, you know who I'll be pulling for...ohh...my stomach hurts just thinking about it. If the Canucks and Wild had to meet, it would be hard to cheer against Pavol.

So much anguish...


These guys are far cooler than you could ever hope to be!

Labels: Brian Rolston, Marian Gaborik, Minnesota, musings, Pavol Demitra, Wild

I just got back from tonight’s Wild/Canucks tilt at GM Place, where the Wild smacked the Canucks around and pwned them to a 5-2 victory.

The game marked the triumphant return of Potatohead Gaborik, who didn’t tear his groin while flashing his famous speed and scoring 2 goals on Roberto Cloutier. The Canucks made it close in the 2nd period, but the Wild basically shut the door in the 3rd period the crowd went home unhappy (well apart from the 6 Wild fans in attendance).

Here’s a brain dump that will clog the Hockey Rants toilet for a week.

Trevor Linden – D00d definitely has had the fork taken out of his back and looked about 5 years younger out there. He’s actually skating, hustling, and just about scored on a very nice individual rush effort. I wonder what performance enhancing substance he’s been using. LaKOTA?

GM Place is a great venue to do a little ‘bird watching’, as the place is filled with a lot of good looking ladies. At the same time, it’s very depressing for a single guy since these ladies are already hooked up with some preening moron.

Best Friends Forever: The Pavol and Potatohead spent a lot of quality on the ice talking to each other, leaving linemate Koivu out in the cold. The Wilds’ other slavs, Skoula and Radivojevic, also spent a lot of chit-chat time together.

Speaking of Martin Skoula, how is it that this guy hasn’t developed any further since his rookie season? He looks awfully clumsy out there at times and could easily be mistaken for a rookie, or Duvie Westcott.

There were quite a few women wearing those awful pink jersey/sweaters at the game. Every single one of them had dyed-blonde hair. Is that a rule? Can a brunette not purchase one of these garments?

I honestly do not mind if people leave the game early. It makes it easier for me to leave the game once it’s FINISHED. The fewer idiots that I have to come into close contact with, the better.

---

Now, here’s a list of people that need to be disemboweled with a thrice-used toilet plunger.

These guys who wear a full business suit and tie to the game. It’s a sporting event, not a board meeting, you empty corporate assholes.

The pair of dweebs (and it’s always two of them) who (try to) start ‘The Wave’. Great, just great! Your mothers didn’t give you enough attention when you were kids and now you have to attract attention to yourself by inciting the crowd in a communistic cheer ritual. Sit down and have some herbal tea.

Anyone who partakes in the “Day-O” chant. Yeah, there are people who actually dig that crap. Do us all a favour and commit suicide, would you please.

Everyone who actually took and used a pair of those atrocious ThunderStix. Not only are they an incredibly stupid way to help destroy the Earth’s environment, but they are more annoying than David Pratt on a Wednesday.

These groups that feel the need to announce their presence by having their names put up on the electronic scoreboard. As if I give a rat’s ass that the people from “Rhino’s Pub” attended tonight’s game. I know which establishment I won’t be patronizing in the future.

The moron who controls the music at GM Place. I didn’t pay $100 to listen to sub-standard music, especially “Cotton Eye Joe”. Put on some more Rammstein and maybe I’ll let you live.

The punks who order two beers at a time (The “double-fisters”) and proceed to spill half of the cup’s contents onto the floor before they reach their seat. Get a lid for those, junior. These are the same punks that light their own farts and think Coldplay is worth listening to.

Finally, the concession stand worker who filled my cup completely full of ice before dispensing the Diet Coke. Hey, I paid $4 for that drink, so I want enough Aspartame to give me cancer next week.

Labels: Canucks, Demitra, Gaborik, Linden, Live Game Recap, Pavol Demitra, Wild