Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Why the Canes Can't Win the Cup
by Jes
Here's a quick question for you ...
Which NHL club has 3 players with 20+ goals and 40+ points, 4 other players with 30+ points, is third best in the league with 144 goals scored, and yet isn't in the playoffs as of today?
Answer: The Carolina Hurricanes.
Yes, once again, Carolina's vaunted offensive power is not enough to make up for its weaknesses on D and in goal.
Look at the defence: Dennis Seidenberg, a good-looking defenseman that has bounced around the league and can barely hold an NHL spot, the ancient duo of Bret Yamaguchi and Glen Wesley, the goalless used-to-be-good-what-the-hell-happened Frantisek Kaberle, Mike "Ronald McDonald" Commodore, the overmatched Tim "This is all we got for Jack Johnson?" Gleason, and Nic "OT Winner" Wallin.
Now, I realize that the Canes won it all with a similar defence a few years back, but that was the mother of all Cinderella runs. We can see that now.
How can a defense where their top scorer has 12 just points, and the entire defence has a whole SEVEN goals this season, be considered anything but crap? Not one of these guys is above average, and the old guys just continue to get worse.
Of course, this point mighty be moot if the goaltenders didn't suck, but they do.
Ever since Cam Ward (undeservedly) won the Conn Smythe, people have been tricked into thinking that he's a great goaltender.
Unfortunately for Carolina, the clock struck midnight and Ward has proven himself to be a below-average goaltender during the regular season.
Cam Ward's playoff stats from that magical run? 15-8 2.13GAA 92.0SV%
His partners in crimes against goaltending this season?
John Grahame: 13GP 3.83GAA 87.5SV%
Mike Leighton: 3GP 2.66GAA 89.7SV%
That's more suckage than the movie Juno. (Guys, if your girl tries to drag you to this, you better get something reeeeeeeeeeeeeally good in return)
Let's face it, we know GM Jim Rutherford has been an exceptionally poor GM for most of his long tenure. Somehow, the guy had an outlier of a year where he made good-for-value signings (like Stillman), made some good deadline deals, and had all of the pieces fall into place. Now? We see he is unable to fill the holes on the back end and the Canes have few prospects that they can deal for veteran assets.
Unless the Canes can do something about their glaring weaknesses, let's not fool ourselves into thinking they can win another Stanley Cup. Winning their weak division? It's possible, and it'll be the only way the Canes make the playoffs. Sad, but true.
Joe Pelletier from The Legends of Hockey blog sends this message to our readers
"I've officially gone crazy. In the past weeks
over at GreatestHockeyLegends.com I've compared Vincent Lecavalier to
Jean Beliveau, Niklas Lidstrom to Raymond Bourque, and Martin St.
Louis to Yvan Cournoyer.
Perhaps my latest set of comparables is a bit of a stretch, but yet
somehow very fitting. Or at least I think so.
Former New York Rangers playboy Ron Duguay is compared to PBS' "Joy of
Painting" host Bob Ross."
Somehow, I doubt Bob Ross ever got Cher in the sack, but what do I know?
Here's a quick question for you ...
Which NHL club has 3 players with 20+ goals and 40+ points, 4 other players with 30+ points, is third best in the league with 144 goals scored, and yet isn't in the playoffs as of today?
Answer: The Carolina Hurricanes.
Yes, once again, Carolina's vaunted offensive power is not enough to make up for its weaknesses on D and in goal.
Look at the defence: Dennis Seidenberg, a good-looking defenseman that has bounced around the league and can barely hold an NHL spot, the ancient duo of Bret Yamaguchi and Glen Wesley, the goalless used-to-be-good-what-the-hell-happened Frantisek Kaberle, Mike "Ronald McDonald" Commodore, the overmatched Tim "This is all we got for Jack Johnson?" Gleason, and Nic "OT Winner" Wallin.
Now, I realize that the Canes won it all with a similar defence a few years back, but that was the mother of all Cinderella runs. We can see that now.
How can a defense where their top scorer has 12 just points, and the entire defence has a whole SEVEN goals this season, be considered anything but crap? Not one of these guys is above average, and the old guys just continue to get worse.
Of course, this point mighty be moot if the goaltenders didn't suck, but they do.
Ever since Cam Ward (undeservedly) won the Conn Smythe, people have been tricked into thinking that he's a great goaltender.
Unfortunately for Carolina, the clock struck midnight and Ward has proven himself to be a below-average goaltender during the regular season.
Year GP GS MIN W L T OTL GAA SV%
05-06 28 25 1484 14 8 0 2 3.68 .882
06-07 60 59 3422 30 21 0 6 2.93 .897
07-08 36 34 2032 17 15 0 3 2.89 .899
Cam Ward's playoff stats from that magical run? 15-8 2.13GAA 92.0SV%
His partners in crimes against goaltending this season?
John Grahame: 13GP 3.83GAA 87.5SV%
Mike Leighton: 3GP 2.66GAA 89.7SV%
That's more suckage than the movie Juno. (Guys, if your girl tries to drag you to this, you better get something reeeeeeeeeeeeeally good in return)
Let's face it, we know GM Jim Rutherford has been an exceptionally poor GM for most of his long tenure. Somehow, the guy had an outlier of a year where he made good-for-value signings (like Stillman), made some good deadline deals, and had all of the pieces fall into place. Now? We see he is unable to fill the holes on the back end and the Canes have few prospects that they can deal for veteran assets.
Unless the Canes can do something about their glaring weaknesses, let's not fool ourselves into thinking they can win another Stanley Cup. Winning their weak division? It's possible, and it'll be the only way the Canes make the playoffs. Sad, but true.
Joe Pelletier from The Legends of Hockey blog sends this message to our readers
"I've officially gone crazy. In the past weeks
over at GreatestHockeyLegends.com I've compared Vincent Lecavalier to
Jean Beliveau, Niklas Lidstrom to Raymond Bourque, and Martin St.
Louis to Yvan Cournoyer.
Perhaps my latest set of comparables is a bit of a stretch, but yet
somehow very fitting. Or at least I think so.
Former New York Rangers playboy Ron Duguay is compared to PBS' "Joy of
Painting" host Bob Ross."
Somehow, I doubt Bob Ross ever got Cher in the sack, but what do I know?
Labels: Hurricanes, stanley cup
Friday, September 07, 2007
Canes Hire Asshole for Goalie Coach
by Jes
How many of you ever considered Tom Barrasso to be coaching material?
If you do, I'd like you to put tin foil on your head, so we know who you are.
Apparently, the Canes think that Barrasso would be a great addition to their hockey operations staff.
By all accounts, Tom Barrasso was a prick to any and all backup goaltenders he ever worked with, and was not popular with his teammates. In terms of overall assholeness, Tommy boy was near the top of the list among all NHLers.
So, this appointment is just simply puzzling. Why would you want to hire a guy that has such poor people skills? Sheesh.
How many of you ever considered Tom Barrasso to be coaching material?
If you do, I'd like you to put tin foil on your head, so we know who you are.
Apparently, the Canes think that Barrasso would be a great addition to their hockey operations staff.
The Carolina Hurricanes named the former all-star netminder director of goaltender development Friday, a role that will see the 42-year-old Barrasso work with all of the goalies in the team's minor-league system.HWHA?!?!? Instant credibility?
"Tom brings instant credibility to his new position, and is somebody that the goaltenders in our system will be able to respect and learn from," Hurricanes GM Jim Rutherford said in a statement. "He has re-located his family to Raleigh and we are happy that he has chosen to continue his life in hockey with our organization."
By all accounts, Tom Barrasso was a prick to any and all backup goaltenders he ever worked with, and was not popular with his teammates. In terms of overall assholeness, Tommy boy was near the top of the list among all NHLers.
So, this appointment is just simply puzzling. Why would you want to hire a guy that has such poor people skills? Sheesh.
Labels: Hurricanes, Tom Barrasso
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Kaberle's ... Khicken Paprika?
By GregThis is sort of post-recycling -- or post-regurgitation, if you will. After the success of Slegr's Garlic Soup, Jes asked if I had any more Slavic hockey recipes simmering on the stove. I referred him to a dish (and post on my blog) from last summer, whipped up by hero to millions Frantisek Kaberle. Jes tried it and found it good, and asked me to retroactively cross-post.
So here we are. (Note: this originally ran right after the Hurricanes won the 2006 Stanley Cup, hence any dated references -- I've tried to remove those, but I'm sure I'll miss some.)
I've probably made it clear that I'm a big fan of Carolina Hurricanes defenseman František Kaberle. I regretted it (mostly alone) when the Thrashers gave up on him; I cheered and felt vindicated when he had a (for the most part) solid Stanley Cup final, including the Cup-winning goal. Since a) the Thrashers didn't have Kaberle in 2005-06, and b) Kaberle scored the Stanley Cup-winning goal in 2006, it logically follows that c) if the Thrashers had kept Kaberle, they would have won the Stanley Cup in 2006. Makes one think, no?
There's a lot of reasons I like Kaberle. He's Czech. He's got movie-star looks. He was easily the most skilled defenseman to wear a Thrashers jersey in their 24-year existence. There's his eight Norris Trophies, his numerous scoring records. He's a great, great man.
And he's also accomplished in the culinary arts. (ok, his wife is.) A while back I mentioned the Kaberles' contribution to "Cooking With the Birds," the Thrashers' cookbook of a few years past. Unfortunately, I didn't give the real recipe, just a parody involving tons and tons of butter. Six people died recreating that fake recipe, and for that, I apologize.
So I stepped up to the oven, and here we are:
Kaberle's Chicken Paprika
Ingredients:
1 chicken breast fillet, boneless and skinless. The cookbook recommends Butterball. Guess what company was one of the cookbook's sponsors. I used Publix brand, with no ill effects.
1 medium onion, chopped
1/4 cup butter
1/2 teaspoon paprika
salt to taste
1 1/2 cups water
1/2 cup sour cream (2007 note: Jes sez, don't use no-fat sour cream -- too runny)
2 tbsp flour
for "side dish":
vodka
limeade
Place a photo or reasonable substitute of Frankie K somewhere in the kitchen. Make it an honored place. A place of respect.Put on some good music. I suggest Dvořák's (Antonin, not Radek) Symphony No. 9 in e minor, F. Kaberle, conductor.
Cut the chicken into small pieces.
Wilt the onion in the melted butter.
Add paprika, chicken, and salt. Brown it. Add water, cover and simmer until tender (about 40 minutes worked for me -- though the cookbook says 45. I probably shouldn't quarrel over details with František Kaberle, author of "Underworld," "End Zone," "Libra" and other critically-acclaimed novels.)
Now's a good time to make the side dish. Take vodka. Pour it into a glass. Maybe people tell you that it's too early to drink. But it's a hot day (if you're in Atlanta, and if not, well, it gets hot other places). You work hard. Don't you deserve this? Yeah. You do. Treat yourself. Anyway. Vodka. I don't know what kind Frankie endorses, so you're on your own here. Top it off with limeade.Doesn't that taste good? Doesn't the world seem a little better? Go ahead. Have another. Repeat until the chicken is done.
Once the chicken is tender, remove it from the pan. Mix the sour cream with flour. I usually eschew sour cream in all facets of my life, but Kaberle is a Nobel laureate and I am not. I'd follow his orders if I were you. Stir the sour cream/flour mixture into pan, simmer the gravy for five minutes.
Strain the gravy over the chicken. Serve with pasta. Another vodka/limeade might be good about now, too.
Enjoy it. Feel grateful that a man such as František Kaberle shares his gifts with us.
Labels: food, Hurricanes, kaberle, thrashers, vodka
Monday, March 05, 2007
Game Recap - Thrashers vs Hurricanes
by Greg
A rare Sunday afternoon tilt yesterday -- giving me the opportunity to go, and since (as previously noted) I generally work when the Thrashers are playing, I have to take such opportunities. Live hockey always has to take precedence. If I were getting married, and I found out there was a game that day, the wedding would have to be called off. Seriously, th
e Thrashers don't put their schedule together in a very Greg-friendly way (granted, since a Greg-friendly way would mean tons of Sunday-Monday games and 11 a.m. start times the rest of the week, I can't really blame them).
It was "Mullet Wig Day," as pictured right, leading to secret hopes of a hat trick, and thousands of mullets drifting down to the ice. Mullet humor isn't exactly Candide, I know, but some of the stuff was pretty funny. Lots of beer helped.
More ominously, it was the Hurricanes, a team that always makes me nervous -- there's the secret fear, deep inside, that every team that has won a Stanley Cup is automatically better and thus will always win. That fear eased some when I saw John Grahame in goal and David Tanabe getting major minutes, but still -- I spent most of the game just waiting for the inevitable
turning point, when the 'Canes would remember their rights as Cup winners, and storm (HA!) back to slap the Thrashers around. It doesn't help that they have all-time favorite Frankie Kaberle back there -- watching him, for me, is like seeing your ex-girlfriend doing really well, living high, flashing her Stanley Cup ring around, while you're in line at the methadone clinic. To counter Kaberle's presence, I had to go all-out and wear the Kloucek Thrashers jersey (only worn in extreme situations), again, pictured right (below mullet).
The most encouraging thing about the game was seeing how much better the Thrashers were, when they were on, when they were focused. Unfortunately, they weren't always on. I don't know if it's a concentration issue, if it's cute Atlanta girls in the stands, if they'd been dipping into the same Heineken stocks as me, but there were times when all skaters on ice seemed distracted, counting the bolts in the floor at the Boston Garden, that sort of thing. A collective fog. Add to that an Atlanta tradition -- at least one bozo turnover in front of the net per game, preferably one per period, usually jump-cutting to Kari Lehtonen looking sadly at the puck behind him -- and you understand why I spend entire games looking nervous.
Lehtonen was great, but he often seems jittery -- leading in turn to me being jittery. He started out last night looking shocked after every shot, sort of a "GAH! Some lunatic is shooting PUCKS at me! What the hell is this??" reaction. The one goal wasn't really his fault, from my end of the ice -- the result of one of those aforementioned turnovers -- but I'd just like to see a bit more ice in those veins (figuratively, of course -- I have no desire to actually see the contents of anyone's veins).
In any case, the game really rested on the shoulders of hero to all, best hockey player ever Marian Hossa. Two goals, nearly a third (and my vision of raining mullets), heady defensive play. And one silent arena when he went hard into the boards and lay there for a minute. Without him, we're nothing. Having Garnet Exelby protecting him from the uncharitable thoughts of opponents isn't enough -- it may be time to hire two large men named Vito to "visit" opposing players before the game and "suggest" they stay away from Hossa. Just a thought.
To sum up: Thrashers won (one of those "four-point games" everyone likes to talk about), the Lightning got stomped the night before (by the Panthers, a team that seems to exist solely to frustrate better division rivals late in the season), and far away, the Avalanche beat Team Twizzler. A really fine Sunday, and I (and my Kloucek jersey) celebrated by going off and getting drunk. Hurrah! I humbly request more Sundays like this.
A rare Sunday afternoon tilt yesterday -- giving me the opportunity to go, and since (as previously noted) I generally work when the Thrashers are playing, I have to take such opportunities. Live hockey always has to take precedence. If I were getting married, and I found out there was a game that day, the wedding would have to be called off. Seriously, th
e Thrashers don't put their schedule together in a very Greg-friendly way (granted, since a Greg-friendly way would mean tons of Sunday-Monday games and 11 a.m. start times the rest of the week, I can't really blame them).It was "Mullet Wig Day," as pictured right, leading to secret hopes of a hat trick, and thousands of mullets drifting down to the ice. Mullet humor isn't exactly Candide, I know, but some of the stuff was pretty funny. Lots of beer helped.
More ominously, it was the Hurricanes, a team that always makes me nervous -- there's the secret fear, deep inside, that every team that has won a Stanley Cup is automatically better and thus will always win. That fear eased some when I saw John Grahame in goal and David Tanabe getting major minutes, but still -- I spent most of the game just waiting for the inevitable
turning point, when the 'Canes would remember their rights as Cup winners, and storm (HA!) back to slap the Thrashers around. It doesn't help that they have all-time favorite Frankie Kaberle back there -- watching him, for me, is like seeing your ex-girlfriend doing really well, living high, flashing her Stanley Cup ring around, while you're in line at the methadone clinic. To counter Kaberle's presence, I had to go all-out and wear the Kloucek Thrashers jersey (only worn in extreme situations), again, pictured right (below mullet).The most encouraging thing about the game was seeing how much better the Thrashers were, when they were on, when they were focused. Unfortunately, they weren't always on. I don't know if it's a concentration issue, if it's cute Atlanta girls in the stands, if they'd been dipping into the same Heineken stocks as me, but there were times when all skaters on ice seemed distracted, counting the bolts in the floor at the Boston Garden, that sort of thing. A collective fog. Add to that an Atlanta tradition -- at least one bozo turnover in front of the net per game, preferably one per period, usually jump-cutting to Kari Lehtonen looking sadly at the puck behind him -- and you understand why I spend entire games looking nervous.
Lehtonen was great, but he often seems jittery -- leading in turn to me being jittery. He started out last night looking shocked after every shot, sort of a "GAH! Some lunatic is shooting PUCKS at me! What the hell is this??" reaction. The one goal wasn't really his fault, from my end of the ice -- the result of one of those aforementioned turnovers -- but I'd just like to see a bit more ice in those veins (figuratively, of course -- I have no desire to actually see the contents of anyone's veins).
In any case, the game really rested on the shoulders of hero to all, best hockey player ever Marian Hossa. Two goals, nearly a third (and my vision of raining mullets), heady defensive play. And one silent arena when he went hard into the boards and lay there for a minute. Without him, we're nothing. Having Garnet Exelby protecting him from the uncharitable thoughts of opponents isn't enough -- it may be time to hire two large men named Vito to "visit" opposing players before the game and "suggest" they stay away from Hossa. Just a thought.
To sum up: Thrashers won (one of those "four-point games" everyone likes to talk about), the Lightning got stomped the night before (by the Panthers, a team that seems to exist solely to frustrate better division rivals late in the season), and far away, the Avalanche beat Team Twizzler. A really fine Sunday, and I (and my Kloucek jersey) celebrated by going off and getting drunk. Hurrah! I humbly request more Sundays like this.
Labels: drinking beer, Hurricanes, kloucek, mullets, thrashers
Friday, February 23, 2007
Raleigh Prepares for Tarantula Invasion
It looks like Anson "Tarantula Head" Carter is on the move again...no real surprise, as the Dinner Jackets were eliminated from the playoffs before the season even began.
From TSN.ca:
The Carolina Hurricanes have acquired the veteran winger from the Columbus Blue Jackets in exchange for a fifth round draft pick in 2008.And since Sillinger has that expensive 3-year contract, it's likely Carter could catch up to him in the near future.
Carter has 10 goals and 17 assists in 53 games with the Blue Jackets this season. In 663 career games with the Blue Jackets, Canucks, Kings, Capitals, Rangers, Oilers and Bruins, Carter has totals of 201 goals and 219 assists.
This is the seventh time Carter has been traded, second only behind Mike Sillinger (traded 10 times) among active NHL players.
Is this good for the Canes? Well, a 5th round pick is really cheap and there is little risk involved other than giving Carter TOO much ice time and not getting production.
I just don't see how the already powerful-at-forward Canes really need a guy like Carter, but it might just be enough to ensure they make the playoffs at all.
Labels: Anson Carter, Hurricanes, trades
