Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Sean Avery: His Crap Works!
by Jes
It's rather well known to my 5-6 readers that Sean Avery is one of my least-favourite players. It's one thing to be a pest, but it's another to be an annoying douchebag with few redeeming qualities. I would NOT want to be a teammate of Sean Avery, no matter how many goals he might score when he puts his mind to it.
That said, I have to respect the fact that he absolutely rocked the New Jersey Devils with his motor-mouth and some big goals. I didn't think the Rangers could beat the Devils, but combine Avery's pestiness with Brodeur's craptastic netminding, and you had the round's first upset.
The only way a bitch like Avery can win is if you acknowledge his presence and let him 'win' the verbal battles. Ignore him, and he'll grow bored once he realizes that you aren't going to play that way.
The New Jersey Devils, especially coach Sutter and Brodeur, were so fixiated on what Avery was doing that they were both extremely off of their games. Brodeur should have been much better than he was, but he was obviously flustered and too hot-headed to make the saves he needed to make.
Per Straight Up Sports:
The Rangers next opponent would be wise to see just how much trouble Avery caused the Devils, and learn to ignore his wisecracks. Yes, it can be hard to resist slapping the shit-eating grin off Sean's stubbly face, but it has to be done.
The more Avery succeeds at getting under your skin, the more he'll crank up the volume of crap he spews out of his sewer mouth.
So, I will give props to Avery for disrupting the usually unflappable Devils so well, but I still want him to paralyzed by an anvil dropped by Wile E. Coyote.
It's rather well known to my 5-6 readers that Sean Avery is one of my least-favourite players. It's one thing to be a pest, but it's another to be an annoying douchebag with few redeeming qualities. I would NOT want to be a teammate of Sean Avery, no matter how many goals he might score when he puts his mind to it.
That said, I have to respect the fact that he absolutely rocked the New Jersey Devils with his motor-mouth and some big goals. I didn't think the Rangers could beat the Devils, but combine Avery's pestiness with Brodeur's craptastic netminding, and you had the round's first upset.
The only way a bitch like Avery can win is if you acknowledge his presence and let him 'win' the verbal battles. Ignore him, and he'll grow bored once he realizes that you aren't going to play that way.
The New Jersey Devils, especially coach Sutter and Brodeur, were so fixiated on what Avery was doing that they were both extremely off of their games. Brodeur should have been much better than he was, but he was obviously flustered and too hot-headed to make the saves he needed to make.
Per Straight Up Sports:
Avery won the battle. He got the entire Devil team chasing him and going after him; leaving the likes of Jagr, Gomez, Henrik to do their thing. Even more irritating, Sean Avery had 3 goals and 2 assists in a series where he got the high holy hell kicked out of him. Not once did he retaliate, not once did he spear Brodeur BACK after one of several times Brodeur slashed and prodded him. The Devils, a lot like the Thrashers last year, seemed a lot more concerned with crosschecking, punching, and disgustingly, horse collaring people as opposed to actually playing hockey, and it cost them. I don't think this can be in dispute. Anyway, back to Avery.Yes, Avery took 3 minor penalties in the series, but that's about par for the course when he's around. He didn't get into any fights, and was generally good at not putting the Rangers shorthanded TOO often.
He reads Vogue magazine. He goes to fashion shows. He paints his finger nails. He wears lame hats. He walks around like a hard ass. He spends $300 on t shirts. I'd bet I'll see him at Tonic East on Saturday Night wearing a pink popped collar shirt once the season ends. He probably cuts off little old ladies flying down the Henry Hudson in his convertible. He typifies everything there is to hate about the stereotypical New Yorker.
The Rangers next opponent would be wise to see just how much trouble Avery caused the Devils, and learn to ignore his wisecracks. Yes, it can be hard to resist slapping the shit-eating grin off Sean's stubbly face, but it has to be done.
The more Avery succeeds at getting under your skin, the more he'll crank up the volume of crap he spews out of his sewer mouth.
So, I will give props to Avery for disrupting the usually unflappable Devils so well, but I still want him to paralyzed by an anvil dropped by Wile E. Coyote.
Labels: Devils, Martin Brodeur, Rangers, Sean Avery
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Rangers Aren't Be-Deviled
by Jes
In my First Round predictions, I gave the New York Rangers little chance and little credit in their ability to beat the New Jersey Devils.
With the Devils on the brink, I obviously have quite a lot of egg on my face.
Admittedly, I don't follow the Devils or Rangers all that closely, since they are far in the East and both not very interesting to watch. Thus, perhaps I should have given more credit to Tom Renney for turning his club into a defensive juggernaught, and getting guys like Chris Drury, Scott Gomez, and Jaromir Jagr to buy into his choking system.
In his preview for FanHouse, Greg Wyshynski, a noted Devils fan, wasn't too upbeat about his team's chance at getting past the first round. Despite some decent names on the Devils roster, Greg thought the Devils lack of offence would come back to bite them.
Certainly, 9 goals in 4 games isn't going to do the trick offensively, but the Devils are a collective -31 in these 4 games, something unheard of in New Jersey Devils hockey since the Mickey Mouse days.
Tongue-in-cheek, Southern Correspondent Wayne asks "The team that has few fans is now down 3-1...Will Lou Lamoriello axe Brent Sutter before game 5 to fire up his team?"
Somehow, I wouldn't be shocked :/
I suppose the Rangers goal scoring woes this season blinded me to the fact that they do, in fact, have a lot more talent up front than the Devils. Shanahan, Jagr, Gomez, Drury, Straka vs. Elias, Madden, Parise, and Langenbrunner...it's no contest.
I suppose, from an outsider's perspective, I can blame the Devils woes on goaltending. It's simplistic, but look at the other stats.
Power Plays - Both teams are at 20%
Penalty Killing - Both teams are at 80%, with the Rangers even shorthanded 5 more times than the Devils
Shots on goal - 124 to 117
Faceoffs - Both teams are near 50%
So, we go to goaltending... Martin Brodeur? A 90.4SV% is well below average, and not the type of golden goaltending we're used to seeing from the man with the golden horseshoe up his ass. Lundqvist? He's at 92.4% after struggling for much of the regular season.
Whatever the case may be, the Rangers are one win away from sweeping aside the Devils, and booting me in the groin for not giving them enough credit.
In my First Round predictions, I gave the New York Rangers little chance and little credit in their ability to beat the New Jersey Devils.
With the Devils on the brink, I obviously have quite a lot of egg on my face.
Admittedly, I don't follow the Devils or Rangers all that closely, since they are far in the East and both not very interesting to watch. Thus, perhaps I should have given more credit to Tom Renney for turning his club into a defensive juggernaught, and getting guys like Chris Drury, Scott Gomez, and Jaromir Jagr to buy into his choking system.
In his preview for FanHouse, Greg Wyshynski, a noted Devils fan, wasn't too upbeat about his team's chance at getting past the first round. Despite some decent names on the Devils roster, Greg thought the Devils lack of offence would come back to bite them.
Certainly, 9 goals in 4 games isn't going to do the trick offensively, but the Devils are a collective -31 in these 4 games, something unheard of in New Jersey Devils hockey since the Mickey Mouse days.
Tongue-in-cheek, Southern Correspondent Wayne asks "The team that has few fans is now down 3-1...Will Lou Lamoriello axe Brent Sutter before game 5 to fire up his team?"
Somehow, I wouldn't be shocked :/
I suppose the Rangers goal scoring woes this season blinded me to the fact that they do, in fact, have a lot more talent up front than the Devils. Shanahan, Jagr, Gomez, Drury, Straka vs. Elias, Madden, Parise, and Langenbrunner...it's no contest.
I suppose, from an outsider's perspective, I can blame the Devils woes on goaltending. It's simplistic, but look at the other stats.
Power Plays - Both teams are at 20%
Penalty Killing - Both teams are at 80%, with the Rangers even shorthanded 5 more times than the Devils
Shots on goal - 124 to 117
Faceoffs - Both teams are near 50%
So, we go to goaltending... Martin Brodeur? A 90.4SV% is well below average, and not the type of golden goaltending we're used to seeing from the man with the golden horseshoe up his ass. Lundqvist? He's at 92.4% after struggling for much of the regular season.
Whatever the case may be, the Rangers are one win away from sweeping aside the Devils, and booting me in the groin for not giving them enough credit.
Labels: Devils, playoffs, Rangers
Friday, October 26, 2007
Wayne's World: Thrashin'
Our Southern correspondant, Wayne, chips in with his thoughts on the Atlanta coaching situation.
Somehow, I get the feeling the Atlanta Spirit (sounds like a cheerleading squad, no?) will force Don Waddell to stick it out behind the Thrasher bench for the entire season or go with the minor-league coach in Chicago. That way, ownership can make a clean sweep after the season and bring in a new G.M./coach combo. On the other hand, the Thrashers have not been building up too much goodwill in the community, and may tell the fans, "We're writing this season off" may kill both advance and walk-up ticket sales...Just after the Birds finally got themselves on the radar last year. (But then again, maybe not so if you remember Tim Tucker's column about the abysmal TV ratings for the playoffs.)
Frankly, with so many players not knowing what the hell they're doing, they look more and more like a first or second-year expansion team...
Well, the Thrashers have rarely NOT looked like an expansion team through much of their inception. Waddell has not been able to get over the hump and turn his squad into a competitive squad on a nightly basis. Despite having loads of offensive talent, defensive and goaltending issues have always plagued the team.
Meanwhile, over in New Jersey, the new arena opening is supposed to bring scads of Devils fans to the games and prosperity to the neighbourhood.
Hands up if you know of any areas that have suddenly turned from crap to gold with the building of a new arena?
*crickets chirping*
What happens when there isn't a game in an arena? It's a big, vast, empty space is what it is.
Somehow, I get the feeling the Atlanta Spirit (sounds like a cheerleading squad, no?) will force Don Waddell to stick it out behind the Thrasher bench for the entire season or go with the minor-league coach in Chicago. That way, ownership can make a clean sweep after the season and bring in a new G.M./coach combo. On the other hand, the Thrashers have not been building up too much goodwill in the community, and may tell the fans, "We're writing this season off" may kill both advance and walk-up ticket sales...Just after the Birds finally got themselves on the radar last year. (But then again, maybe not so if you remember Tim Tucker's column about the abysmal TV ratings for the playoffs.)
Frankly, with so many players not knowing what the hell they're doing, they look more and more like a first or second-year expansion team...
Well, the Thrashers have rarely NOT looked like an expansion team through much of their inception. Waddell has not been able to get over the hump and turn his squad into a competitive squad on a nightly basis. Despite having loads of offensive talent, defensive and goaltending issues have always plagued the team.
Meanwhile, over in New Jersey, the new arena opening is supposed to bring scads of Devils fans to the games and prosperity to the neighbourhood.
Throughout the ceremony, he heard speaker after speaker refer to the “renaissance” and “rebirth” of Newark, words he had repeatedly used in recent years to extol the virtues of building the 17,000-seat arena.
Jeff Vanderbeek, the chairman of Devils Arena Entertainment, was the first person connected with the project to speak. Mr. Vanderbeek, the arena’s main developer, said that Mr. Booker, Mr. James’s successor, was “the reason this city will prosper.”
Hands up if you know of any areas that have suddenly turned from crap to gold with the building of a new arena?
*crickets chirping*
What happens when there isn't a game in an arena? It's a big, vast, empty space is what it is.
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Photo of the Day: Alyssa Milano, Devils Fan
Ok, this wretched franchise has ONE redeeming quality ...
Labels: Alyssa Milano, Devils, picture of the day
Thursday, April 05, 2007
NHL: Martin Brodeur Sets Wins Record for Goalies*
by Jes
(c) Getty Images
Look, anyone with some semblance of individual thought knows that Brodeur's record is a sham. Parent, classy as he is, has a right, if he wishes, to be pissed off that he's lost his record thanks to the advent of the shootout.
Over at The Fanhouse, JP offers his take:
An asterisk? No, I don't believe that's quite right. The record is tainted, yes, but not because of Brodeur's doing.
You know how baseball has 'modern' records and 'old time' records? Perhaps the NHL should adopt a classification for New NHL records, such as Brodeur's wins record. The New NHL has added a whole new whack of oddities to the mix, and manipulated the standings. Having a team achieve 100 points in a season isn't quite the achievement it used to be. Instead of a bunch of *****, just have a New NHL set of records for some categories, and another for traditional records.
Anyone got a better idea?
(c) Getty Images
Martin Brodeur and the New Jersey Devils had a record-setting night against the worst team in the NHL.What is on the note? "YOUR RECORD IS TAINTED" ??
Brodeur surpassed Bernie Parent, Philadelphia's stalwart Stanley Cup-winning goalie, for wins in a season with 48 and the Devils clinched the Atlantic Division title with a 3-2 win over the Flyers on Thursday night.
"I think with him being an icon as far as goalies for the Flyers, to go into Philly and do it here, I couldn't write it a lot better than that," Brodeur said.
Brodeur stopped 34 shots, including a breakaway in the second, to break the 33-year-old record in the city where Parent led the Broad Street Bullies to two Stanley Cup championships. While some retired stars want to see their records stand forever, Parent said before the game he was rooting for Brodeur.
"This is his year," said Parent, his retired No. 1 hanging from the rafters. "He's played fantastic hockey. It couldn't have happened to a more fantastic individual."
Parent sent a personal note that Brodeur said he would read at home.
Look, anyone with some semblance of individual thought knows that Brodeur's record is a sham. Parent, classy as he is, has a right, if he wishes, to be pissed off that he's lost his record thanks to the advent of the shootout.
Over at The Fanhouse, JP offers his take:
Brodeur has won a League-high 10 of those games in shootouts. Bernie Parent won, well, none of his games in shootouts, but did tie a dozen games that year -- games that would have gone to the shootout had they existed. It's a safe bet that Parent, that year's Vezina Trophy winner as the League's best goalie, would have won enough of those shootouts that we wouldn't even be talking about Brodeur closing in on his record right now, much less tying or breaking it.
... is the record legitimate or does it deserve the dreaded asterisk?
An asterisk? No, I don't believe that's quite right. The record is tainted, yes, but not because of Brodeur's doing.
You know how baseball has 'modern' records and 'old time' records? Perhaps the NHL should adopt a classification for New NHL records, such as Brodeur's wins record. The New NHL has added a whole new whack of oddities to the mix, and manipulated the standings. Having a team achieve 100 points in a season isn't quite the achievement it used to be. Instead of a bunch of *****, just have a New NHL set of records for some categories, and another for traditional records.
Anyone got a better idea?
Labels: brodeur, Devils, Martin Brodeur, New Jersey, NHL, nhl record
Monday, April 02, 2007
Report: Claude Julien Fired by the Devils
by Jes
What the hell is going on in Joisey? (Besides mob activity, that is...)
From the What The Hell Files comes word that Devils coach Claude Julien was canned this morning.
TSN.ca Link
And this isn't the first time that Uncle Lou has done something weird like this...
Now, would you want to coach the Devils, given this history of weird behaviour by management?
What the hell is going on in Joisey? (Besides mob activity, that is...)
From the What The Hell Files comes word that Devils coach Claude Julien was canned this morning.
TSN.ca Link
Lou Lamoriello is back behind the bench in New Jersey.Is leading the division not good enough for some people? Hell, I figured NJ would be fighting for a playoff spot, not the division title.
The playoff-bound Devils have fired head coach Claude Julien with less than a week to go in the regular season with the veteran GM Lamoriello taking over for the second straight season.
Lamoriello also stepped behind the bench last season after Larry Robinson stepped down as coach in December.
The surprising move Monday comes with the Devils second in the Eastern Conference with a 47-24-8 record and 102 points. The Devils have won four of their last five games, including Sunday's 3-1 win over Boston. They went 6-6-2 in March while battling key injuries to Brian Gionta, John Madden and Patrik Elias.
And this isn't the first time that Uncle Lou has done something weird like this...
Monday's firing isn't the only time Lamoriello made a late-season coaching move. He fired Robby Ftorek late in the 2002-2003 season and Robinson eventually led the team to its third Stanley Cup since 1995.Uncle Lou has run his team like a cult before, and I do feel for Julien. The Devils have played well this season, and what makes Lou think he can do a better job? Is there another story that isn't being told here?
Now, would you want to coach the Devils, given this history of weird behaviour by management?
Labels: Claude Julien, Coach firing, Devils, Lou Lamoriello
