Monday, August 21, 2006


Every Girl's Crazy About A Sharp-Dressed Man

I recently remarked to a friend that one of my greatest regrets in life is that I didn't stock up on Hasek Hot Sauce when it was still available. Add to that regret -- I didn't re-outfit myself head to toe in Krzysztof Oliwa's clothing line.

Oliwa's NHL fortunes have waned in recent years, aside from one full-time stint in Calgary, and I kind of doubt we'll see him at the highest level again. A little-known casualty of his career dip, though, is his foray into the sartorial arts.

Starting about the turn of the century, Oliwa Enterprises had two clothing lines -- "KO Gear," still described on a barely-functioning website as "Urban Apparel for the American Mix," and "Polish Hammer Enforcer Gear and Apparel." The latter website is totally down, which is unfortunate, because I would now sacrifice a few years off of my life for a "Polish Hammer" t-shirt. And, while I wouldn't ever wear it, there's something (seriously) rather charming about some dude from Tychy, Poland, coming to America to play hockey, and ending up selling clothing marketed to the hip-hop audience.

I have always liked Oliwa -- he seems like a generally good chap -- and as he went into hockey exile last season, I sort of comforted myself by muttering "at least he's got the clothing line." Now I find out even that isn't true.

For those who want a new look to start off the 2006-07 season -- KO Gear is selling its stock on eBay at what can only be described as "closeout" prices. Get rid of that ugly Red Wings jersey and wear a real conversation-starter.

Is Oliwa the gentleman in the photo? If so, I wouldn't feel too sorry for him. Female in photo appears to be top drawer.
(speaking of product endorsements) I bet you have some Jagr Peanut Butter around Fortress Golbez.'d rather not eat anything that is both CREAMY and JAROMIR JAGR
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