Tuesday, November 15, 2005

 

These Blues Have No Clues

It sucks to be a sucky Blues fan this season. I knew the Blues were bad, and I predicted them to finish lower than everyone else but Washington, but I didn't think it would be THIS bad, ya know?

2-12-3?? Mon dieu!

I mean, the Blues can't even find an owner that doesn't totally suck me sideways. As mentioned before, Dave "Checkbook" Checketts didn't end up buying the team and now the Blues are stuck in limbo with a bad owner and a bad bad bad GM. (Hockey Nation does a fine job on the details of the non-sale)

Time for a little ramblin'
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THE GOOD

Petr Cajanek - My boy is finally showing the offensive assertiveness that earned him great stardom in Czechia with HC Zlin. After two rather quiet NHL seasons, Cajanek is using the increased Power Play time to dish some sweet passes and has 10 Power Play points this season. Cajanek sits with 2 goals and 14 assists in 17 games and has arrived.

Scott Young - For all the flak I gave the Blues for this desperation signing, it's turned out to be more than OK. Young also has 10 Power Play points and has 4 goals and 10 assists in 17 games. For the low cost of his signing and the expectations we had, Young has been one of the few things to turn out better than expected.

Eric Weinrich - For a 56-year old defenseman, he's still pretty good.

Lottery Time!!! The Blues will get a great shot at Phil Kessel or Michael Frolik. Let's hope the Blues don't blow their Top 2 pick.

THE BAD = EVERYTHING ELSE!!!

The Blues special teams are special in the way that Timmy and his Christmas Telethon are to mentally and/or physically challenged kids. The Blues are ranked 24th in Power Play% with 14.3% and 23rd in Penalty Kill% with 79.8%

Keith Tkachuk's fat and injured ass: 2 games, 0 pts, -2, and a severe groin strain that will hamper his efforts once he gets back from healing his cracked ribs. Spending almost a quarter on one player that is overweight and non-productive is turning out to be a complete nightmare for the Blues.

Defence - Eric Brewer was the big prize in the Chris Pronger trade, but he's been a big bust with a team worst -12 to go along with his 4 goals and (only) 2 assists. Brewer is whiffing so bad that Blues fans are pining for the days of Ricard Persson!! Trade-mate Jeff Woywitka is also struggling with no points, -5, and 14 PIM in 9 games. Brewer's partner in defensive crimes against humanity, Bryce Salvador, is struggling to adapt to the "New NHL" and he's got -11 and just 2 points in 16 games.

As a team, the Blues are a composite -97! The ONLY player with a plus rating is Peter Sejna. He's played only 2 games (and is +1) and doesn't really count. Every other player is either EVEN or a minus. If you want to teach your kid all about subtraction and the psychics of sucking, just look at the Blues' players statistics.

Goaltending - When I did a comparison of Dan Cloutier and Patrick Lalime a long time ago, we discovered that Lalime's numbers were not all that impressive. Take him away from a very talented and defensive-oriented Senators club and plunk him behind a bunch of junk and you expose him for a pretty crappy goalie. Lalime hasn't just been bad, he's been BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD. (He's bad, he's really really bad)
He's got a 2-9-3 record with a 4.00GAA and 86.7SV%!! Lalime hasn't been stealing any games for the Blues and he's let in more softies than Jim Carey once did.
His backup, Reinhard Divis, has been even worse with a 4.93GAA and 84.5 SV% in his 5 games.

Can we bring back Roman Turek?

The 'No-Name' Brand - You know it's bad when you have to dress names like Len Stempniak, Jeff Hoggan, Dennis Wideman, and Colin Hemingway. If you don't know who they are, well either do most Blues fans.

This season can't end fast enough for the Blues Nation. Fortunately, I also cheer for the Vancouver Canucks, who don't totally suck despite the fact that they try to suck by playing Dan Cloutier as a #1 instead of Alex Auld.

Comments:
wideman has a shot. brewer is injured real good (and there is much rejoicing)ans sanford shut out the worse team in the league offensivelly. blues trending up!!
 
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